I don't even know if it’s a movie or a television series but for whatever reason, the title stuck with me and has been on my mind all week. Sadly, I don’t even have the strength to search for it on IMDB, just as I didn’t have the strength to publish this post on Saturday as I had hoped (please note that this blog post was written as if I was writing it on Friday night...it's been a week in the making!). This week, I feel like I've experienced a 'rude awakening' because…wait for it…I have Bell's palsy again. I had it 5 or 6 years ago and the nasty virus has, once again, reared its ugly head (if it had a head, I’m sure it would be damn ugly!).
What is Bell’s palsy? Well, I don’t want to go into the medical jargon because there's a lot of contradictory information out there so instead I'll keep it simple: it’s a virus that results in temporary paralysis of half of your face. Ugh! I know! In my case, it’s the right side of my face. I think it was 5 or 6 years ago when I had my first experience with this virus. I first noticed there was something wrong with me when I went to take a sip of water but the water drooled down my chin. I took another sip and the same thing happened (no, I wasn't drunk at the time!). I wondered if the issue was dental-related. Then I started having a weird sensation in my eye and the right side of my face started to feel a little weird. I called the Health Line to find out what could be happening. I was, however, still convinced it was a dental issue! I explained my symptoms to the nurse on the phone and her response was “I’m sending an ambulance”. I begged her not to send an ambulance because I felt fine. She asked me if there was someone who could drive me to the hospital. I said there was no one to drive me but I could drive myself. She didn’t like the idea but she told me she would be contacting the hospital to let them know I was on my way. Even though I felt fine and it was only half of my face that felt bizarre, the nurse managed to scare the shit out of me! On my way to the hospital, I explained to Sarah that if anything happened to me while I was driving, she needed to put the car in neutral and pull the parking brake (I don't even know if that's what you're supposed to do!). Poor kid! She was only 12 years old at the time, and even though she was probably terrified, she put on a brave face. I’m happy to say that we survived the trip to the hospital! Once there, the nurse took me right away and I saw a doctor quickly which was shocking because I’ve always had to wait at emergency. It turns out, they thought I was having a heart attack. The reality was that I had Bell’s palsy. I ended up taking an anti-viral medication and steroids (prednisone). The prednisone somehow affects the adrenal glands so I ended up getting almost no sleep for 4 weeks. Over the 4 week period, the dose was slowly reduced to wean me off of the drug. Lovely! I also gained 20lbs…lucky me! The good news is that I had no permanent damage from the illness. Phew!
I’m happy to say (if there’s any happiness in this sequel!) that my current experience with Bell's palsy has been much different. First of all, I knew what was happening to me this time. I didn’t, however, pay attention to the early warning signs. It turns out that my right shoulder isn’t frozen shoulder but rather a symptom of the virus. Also, my sore ear, sore throat and pain behind my ear were also signs of what was to come. The third sign was the loss of taste buds on Thursday. The obvious sign came on Sunday when I went to lick my lips but something didn’t feel right. The other symptoms have been a really sore ear (the soreness progressed), very sensitive hearing (the clinking of dishes especially hurt my ears and people who talk too loud!), the right side of my face is temporarily paralyzed and has a bit of a droop (my eyebrows no longer line up which means the uni-brow is no longer noticeable!) so my speech is affected and my right eye won't close. Oh and did I mention I have no energy?
Thankfully, Dr. Acupuncture took quick action and pricked me with needles on Sunday, Monday and Tuesday. After Tuesday’s session, she suggested that I go to the hospital to get meds to get rid of the virus quickly and so “my kid would stop worrying”. Not that Sarah was worried (well, she probably was!) but I think everyone felt better knowing that I was going to get meds even though I was dreading being on those awful drugs. So I waited 4 hours at the hospital only to be told that I should come back in the morning to see a neurologist. I went for acupuncture on Wednesday morning then to see the neurologist. What he told me was music to my sore ears! He said that there was no real conclusive evidence that the anti-viral medication and the prednisone worked (finally, a medical professional who admits that the medicine we're prescribed isn't always effective or needed!). He said the prednisone reduces inflammation but he said that the acupuncture and facial massages seem to be doing that already without the meds. He told me to continue what I was doing and get lots of sleep. He sent me on my way with a half-smiling face. Dr. Acupuncture has seen me every day since last Sunday (even on her days off!) and has me drinking chamomile tea, lots of warm water, eating rice slop, massaging my face and making funny faces to keep my muscles moving (or I should say…to get them moving!). I’m sleeping 18 hours a day, hence the reason why my blog post is late. I don’t have any energy plus my eye doesn’t close so it gets tired quickly especially if I’m staring at a computer screen. I’m hopeful that I will get through this with no permanent damage. The neurologist said I have lots in my favour for a full recovery: I’m young, I don’t smoke, I don’t have diabetes, and I’m not overweight. I’m young and not overweight??? He must be visually-impaired :P
Thankfully, Dr. Acupuncture took quick action and pricked me with needles on Sunday, Monday and Tuesday. After Tuesday’s session, she suggested that I go to the hospital to get meds to get rid of the virus quickly and so “my kid would stop worrying”. Not that Sarah was worried (well, she probably was!) but I think everyone felt better knowing that I was going to get meds even though I was dreading being on those awful drugs. So I waited 4 hours at the hospital only to be told that I should come back in the morning to see a neurologist. I went for acupuncture on Wednesday morning then to see the neurologist. What he told me was music to my sore ears! He said that there was no real conclusive evidence that the anti-viral medication and the prednisone worked (finally, a medical professional who admits that the medicine we're prescribed isn't always effective or needed!). He said the prednisone reduces inflammation but he said that the acupuncture and facial massages seem to be doing that already without the meds. He told me to continue what I was doing and get lots of sleep. He sent me on my way with a half-smiling face. Dr. Acupuncture has seen me every day since last Sunday (even on her days off!) and has me drinking chamomile tea, lots of warm water, eating rice slop, massaging my face and making funny faces to keep my muscles moving (or I should say…to get them moving!). I’m sleeping 18 hours a day, hence the reason why my blog post is late. I don’t have any energy plus my eye doesn’t close so it gets tired quickly especially if I’m staring at a computer screen. I’m hopeful that I will get through this with no permanent damage. The neurologist said I have lots in my favour for a full recovery: I’m young, I don’t smoke, I don’t have diabetes, and I’m not overweight. I’m young and not overweight??? He must be visually-impaired :P
So Bell’s palsy is back! Why? Well, I think it's back to teach me a lesson. Leaving the house at 5:35am for work and getting home at 5:45pm is not a well-balanced day which leaves me little time or energy to do the things I want to do such as visit with my parents, brother, BFF and her family, go to fitness class, find a boyfriend, go for walks with Neighbour, practice piano, party, catch up on my reading, bloog blog, and volunteer at the medical clinic (p.s. I always have time and energy to text and chat with Sarah!). I still end up doing those things even though I’m exhausted but at what cost? It's all too much. Maybe there aren't enough hours in the day to do everything I want to do and still find time to relax and rejuvenate. Guess what? I now have time. I'm on bed rest for at least two weeks. Are you learning anything from my illness?
I've also been reminded that there are so many people who love and care for me. Not that I needed to be reminded but it is so wonderful to see how people get into caring mode when someone is sick. The kindness of others has been a blessing (even if I can't accept most of their offers!). Sarah, my parents, my brother, BFF and her family, Neighbour, my colleagues, friends and family have checked in to see if I needed anything. BFF came over with food on Sunday, day 1 of illness. Neighbour made me some minestrone soup (I’ll be asking her to make me more when I’m better and can actually eat it then I’ll post her recipe on my blog). BFF brought me over eggs and English muffins when I thought I was craving an Egg McMuffin. Sadly, it was just a tease because I’m still not in eating mode even though I get cravings (positive: maybe I'll lose some weight?). So far, I've craved Egg McMuffin, pizza, poutine and apples. Interestingly, I haven't craved ice cream :P
Most importantly, the lovely people in my life have been there to lift my spirits. Sarah has been calling or texting every day so that’s been great. My parents and brother check in every day to make sure I’m okay. Dr. Acupuncture sees me every day (even on her days off!), and BFF checks in every day too. One of the things they all have in common is their ability to make me laugh. I won’t name all of the things that made this temporarily half-paralyzed face laugh but I’d like to share a small part of a text conversation with BFF about “X” that had me laughing so much (and trust me, you don’t want to see what I look like when I’m laughing…it’s not pretty!):
Me: X sent me a text asking me out for wings tonight. Lucky me :P
BFF: What a complete idiot.
BFF: I mean you for not saying yes :P
BFF: I’m LMAO!!!
Me: I was just about to write LMAO but the truth is that I drooled all over myself when I burst out laughing. Thanks for that :P
BFF: LOL! Don’t short out your phone with drool :P
Me: Had he only said “Big Mac” then he would have had me
BFF: LMFAO
Speaking of BFF, it’s her birthday today so HAPPY BIRTHDAY BFF!!! I hope you have a wondeful day. I'm sorry I won't be there to celebrate with you today but we'll have many other opportunities once I'm 100% recovered!
Oh, in case you’re wondering, I’m unable to block text messages on my iPhone, thus the reason why I’m still receiving text messages from X. You’d think, after his texts have gone unanswered for so long, he would have stopped trying a long time ago!!! Ugh!
I know so many people want to help but there's really nothing you can do (about my illness not X!). Well, actually, there is something I need help with...the housework!!! I know it’s not BFF's thing so I'm waiting for my parents and brother to visit on Saturday. There will be a list of things for them to do around the house. Lucky them! Now that's a rude awakening :P
So to recap, this is what I’ve learned:
- I’m very “susceptible to drafts” so I should wear a scarf when I’m outside, and I shouldn’t sleep with my window open or around any drafts.
- I shouldn’t drink cold beverages or eat cold food which includes ice cream (ugh!). I guess that eating 8 ice creams bars in one day is not healthy. Ugh! x 8 :)
- I need to find balance in my life and I need to better understand the concept of yin and yang. Once I learn that, I’ll be better prepared to bring balance back into my life.
I need to find a way to block text messages from X.- I need to find a way to better manage stress, worry and fear.
- I need to find more time to relax, rejuvenate and meditate.
- I should never go outside with wet hair!
- I need to better understand my body so I know the signs of illness/stress then I'll be better able to give it what it needs (healthy food and exercise!).
- I need to find a better way to let the people I love know that I love them and appreciate them. I'm so very lucky!!!
- I need to learn to love myself much more than I do right now. Once I learn how to love myself, all of the above will come easily!
Maybe Bell's palsy isn't so much a rude awakening but a gift...
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